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I have been with my Turkish husband for 4 1/2 years. When we originally decided to marry, he had business obligations which would not allow him to leave Turkey at the time. However, we agreed that in the future, we would make decisions together about where we would live. His businesses are going terribly, and I have not been able to deal with the cultural differences of living in his very small town, or with not being able to do my job or at least have a spouse with a reliable income to depend upon. When I raised the idea several months ago of moving to the U.S., he was very adamant that he would not move, and told me I could go alone, as he wanted to run his failing businesses in Turkey. This was nothing like the attitude he had when we were engaged, so I decided that I would, in fact, go home. However, a very short time later, I found out that I was pregnant. He is now planning to buy a house completely on credit. I have a doctoral degree in the U.S. and millionaire parents with several houses. Neither he nor his parents have any money whatsoever; nor do they own a house or land. His father does not work due to health problems, and his mother works all day to pay their rent. His father also has a criminal record. My father is retired, and my mother will soon retire as well. Will any of this work in my favor to obtain custody of the child? Should I try to get a divorce before the child is born and give birth in the U.S. so my child does not have Turkish citizenship (I presume it is conveyed at birth, not conception)? Will it be difficult to get a divorce because of the pregnancy? I would like to work things out with my husband, or at least have him present for his first child's birth, but I am afraid that if I stay longer and decide to leave later, it will be impossible to take my child out of Turkey. Thank you for your advice.
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Dear Konuk (Guest),
It seems you have lost your hope in continuation of your marriage.
Pregnancy is not an obstacle for getting divorced.
I advise you to make consensual divorce which is quite simple and quick if you can convince your husband.
If your husband opposes to consensual divorce or to your divorce case, it will probably be quite difficult you to get divorce decree before birth.
In this situation the court will have to decide about custody of the child beside divorcement as well.
But it seems highly probable that custody of the child will be given to you if he/she is born before or during divorce suit since he/she will need mother compassion and care and because of your economical situation.
But suppose that I only shed some light on the matter and the information provided here is just a limited one.
I urgently advise you to get legal assistance from a licensed English-speaking attorney at law (Turkish or even additionally of your own country) before taking action or conducting legal transactions.
Wish you all the best.